Post by Joe the Revelator on Apr 11, 2015 10:17:57 GMT
Next, follow this pitch format:
- Catchy Article Title
- Intro/Preamble to your article
- One complete article segment
- List of additional article segments you'd like to write
- Include source links!
Here is an example of a pitch:
Thread Title: 2 Manly Feats of Strength
Intro: Since time immemorial man has tested his strength, stamina, and prowess against the forces of nature. We climbed sheer, crumbling cliffs just to say we did it. We hunted lions with spears to prove our valor to the tribe. We allowed poisonous insects to pierce our skin to display our unflinching resolve. And we challenge giant flightless birds to spaghetti eating contests to…wait, that one doesn’t sound right.
Really? This happened?
Well, okay.
For your entertainment, here are two unnecessary (and possibly idiotic) feats of manly strength performed by individuals hell-bent on telling the animal kingdom to step aside.
First Entry: 1) Ping Bodie vs Percy the Ostrich
In 1919 Ping Bodie was a center fielder for the New York Yankees. And as we all know in the early prohibition era America had 3 things in abundance: liquor, baseball, and a shockingly negligent attitude toward animal cruelty.
So it was that Ping agreed to duel the prize bird of the Jacksonville Florida Zoo– an ostrich named Percy. What was the weapon of choice picked by the Italian-American ball player?
Spaghetti.
On April 3rd the Jacksonville City Hall was filled with eager onlookers, despite the event not being advertised in the local paper. Ping managed to put down 11 bowls of pasta while Percy, probably due to his tiny brain, tried to match the burly baller noodle-for-noodle. By firsthand accounts Percy also ate a man’s pocket watch by accident. And depending on the source, passed out and possibly died after the 11th dish, from what we recognize today as “Old Country Buffet Exhaustion.”
When you consider the fact that ostriches can stomach about 8 pounds of grain, one might find Percy’s death-by-pasta a little suspect. Except for the fact that articles about ostriches and emus eating themselves to death is pretty easy to come by.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ping_Bodie
animals.howstuffworks.com/birds/ostrich-facts.htm
Second Entry: 2) Octopus Wrestling
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Octopus_wrestling
www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/giant-octopuses-werent-the-worlds-best-wrestlers/
Third Entry: 3) Man vs Orangutan in a bar-hang contest
www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbo3jjs4AW0
If you've already written the article and want further direction, or would like to pitch a partially finished article, post it to this board in a self-titled thread with a link to your work on a google docs or google drive.